Solitary Confinement

Yep folks, it was strep throat and for about two days, I was locked up. That's never a good thing for me. Makes me crazy.

On Thursday, I almost drowned in my own saliva because it hurt too bad to swallow. My wonderful doctor gave me some drugs, including a prescription for amoxycillin (sp?).
Okay, answer me this: if I can't even swallow my own spit, how I am expected to choke down this horse pill?? The answer? My answer for everything - - ice cream! My dad would've been proud to see me pulverizing a pill. I then sprinkled said drug on vanilla ice cream, added orange juice and VOILA! an amped-up dreamsicle!

After sleeping for no less than 11 hours, I awoke on Friday and COULD SWALLOW!!!! Okay, the throat was still sore, but solid food was no longer the enemy. Question of the day: does anyone know what Alexander Fleming was famous for?*

Sitting at home wallowing in my misery, I got a bit cranky (hard to believe, I know!!) and toyed with the idea of getting all dressed up and going out, spreading the joy of strep throat. Specifically, I planned to hook up with ex-boyfriends and play tonsil-hockey for a while and then merrily go on my way to the next victim. A modern day Typhoid Mary! Fortunately, I had not taken the other drugs yet, or else the trouble REALLY would've started.

The other drug my doctor prescribed was steroids. I wanted to say, "Hey doc, I'm not in the lineup today, what's with the juice?" She explained that the steroids would bring down the chipmunk-like swelling in my throat. The side effects she mentioned were hunger, sleep disruptions and possible depression. Little did she know...

I discovered a few other side effects when I went to bed on Friday. I set my alarm clock so that I didn't sleep all day on Saturday. I can't even explain why I set the alarm when I had nowhere to go and nothing to do on Saturday. Anyway, when I awoke to no alarm and checked the settings, I realized that I had set the alarm to wake me up Saturday NIGHT!
Steroid side effect #1: stupidity.

Saturday was so beautiful and warm that I wanted to get some sun, so I pulled on a bikini and trotted up to the rooftop deck where I knew I'd be alone. Everyone else has freedom!!! Everyone else is at.the.beach! Half asleep in the sun, I noticed that my tall, dark-haired, cute Irish neighbor had taken a spot about 10 feet away from me on the deck. A smile crept across my face as the fantasies began.
Steroid side effect #2: horniness.

In light of those two interactions, I guess it's probably a good thing I was quarantined.

*Oh, I forgot! My hero, Alexander Fleming, was a Scottish scientist who discovered penicillin in 1928. Why we won't have a worldwide holiday in his honor is beyond me!